Penny vs. Cancer

Penny

2010-03-27T01:24:00.002-05:00

Penny peacefully left us early afternoon on Friday, March 26, 2010.

People like Penny Lamont McAllister don't come along very often. She made our lives magical. We love her and will miss her forever.

Thanks for all the love and support.

Jonathan

Just got more serious

2010-03-24T19:25:00.002-05:00

Penny's body completely gave out today. She actually left us for a while, but was resuscitated. White counts low, breathing on ventilator, blood pressure low. Not pretty. Not fun.

I really am unsure about what words to use for this post, but decided I needed to keep you guys informed.

Home with the girls. Thanks for the love.

Jonathan

"This is serious"

2010-03-24T14:26:00.002-05:00

That's how Dr. Hinton put it to Penny's mama this morning. Penny's blood counts are low, blood pressure has been low, trouble breathing. She practically can't communicate with us, and is incapable of almost anything. Could go on ventilator later today.

This is serious alright.

Jonathan

Mom made a funny

2010-03-23T10:40:00.003-05:00

MK and I headed up to ICU yesterday to see Mom. She looked a MILLION times better than when we saw her on the second floor Sunday afternoon. Vitals were great and things are looking up.

We (MK and I) got a small case of the giggles while sitting with Mom as she was half asleep and had just taken a Phenegren (sp?) before we got there which resulted in "word vomit" and some pretty funny conversations that we can't wait to tell Mom about. With a woman as creative as Mom you can imagine the types of things she was saying.

We want to thank EVERYONE for the thoughts and prayers being sent our way-keep 'em coming!

God bless all the Dr.'s and nurses in the ICU that have taken such wonderful care of Mom. They are angels here on earth who don't get near enough credit as they deserve.

Love to ALL!

Katie

Moovin...

2010-03-21T19:22:00.001-05:00

Mom has had a rough couple of days at the hospital. She's been moved to ICU so the nurses can keep a closer eye on her. Still no visitors, immediate family only. Thanks for all of your thoughts and prayers. We can only go up from here!!

Peace. MK.

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How o spent my spring break

2010-03-17T15:23:00.001-05:00

Yep, back in the hospital again '

Love, Penny

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It was here all the time...

2010-03-14T11:48:00.002-05:00

Thanks to dear friend, former colleague, and cancer survivor, Andrea Minear.

She had sent two that she had worn during her chemo. Another good friend, Kathie Gascoigne had dropped them off for me during a time when I was REALLY DOWN, and very swollen. I put one one, probably backwards, and promptly swore off wigs.

However, after getting two good makeup advisors in the house and challenging them to "well, put the damn make up on me if you think I need it so much!", materials were gathered and they begin play.

Then I remembered the first wigs that were brought by!

We had a winner and it was great to see the looks on the nurses on 2nd floors' faces when I rolled in for my nupagen shot.

It was a great affirmation!

Thank you Andrea, Kathie, Katie and Mary-Keeley for making feel like the old me again!!!!

Love,

Penny

What do you think??

2010-03-13T20:11:00.001-06:00

Is this Penny or what? Thanks to a good friend, mama's got a brand new 'do! Today, Katie, mama and I had a mini makeover session! She's looking good folks, don't be suprised if you see her sippin' a margarita at Pepitos soon.

Why is it that a good haircut and a little lipstick can completely change your attitude? I'd say it's the little girl in all of us, whispering "I wanna feel preeetty". And that she is folks, that she is.

We'll get some better pics up soon.

Peace. MK.

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Katie's new adventure....

2010-03-11T09:42:00.003-06:00

Today Katie is taking me to the Cancer Center for my shots.

I'm really glad that yesterday I had the presence of mind to get them to check my blood while I there because she would have probably been freaked out about the turn of events.

One shot became one shot plus one unit of blood plus one unit of platelets plus one dose of liquid potassium.

I have to admit I'm feeling much better today, though.

I wish I knew how to explain how having leukemia feels. Yes, there are similar things felt amongst all us chemo-guzzlers but some how, I know this is so different.

Being weak and breathless is not easy. Feeling your stomach "roil", and at the least opportune time(s) is a symptom that chemo-guzzlers can relate to. I can't say how they do on making it to where they "need to be" when this happens but it can be hard if you have no breath or energy.

I see people walking in for their chemo treatments. I have to be rolled in, rolled back, rolled out.

Part of it is my fault for not building up muscles when I was earlier on in my treatments.

Katie is here now....let the adventure begin!

AFLAC.........

2010-03-10T18:27:00.002-06:00

You've seen the duck.

You've heard the "QuACK"

You really need to get their cancer insurance plan. Seriously.

After my dad passed away with lung cancer 16 years ago, my mother told me, "Call Bruce Caples today. Get the cancer insurance."

For some reason I didn't drag my feet on "Mama-advice" and got with Bruce pretty quickly.

Wise choice. Wise advice.

Though, truth be told, I never imagined I would be the one using it since I'm married to a smoker.

But, using it I am.

I do not work for AFLAC, btw.

Love,

Penny

Vampirism , part deaux

2010-03-10T16:32:00.001-06:00

Blood. Geeze, I need so much of it.

And, ugh, today I had to have a dose (drink) of liquid potassium. Thank heavens Mama had just returned from lunch with a root beer.

Liquid potassium is WORSE than that stuff they give you pre-colonoscopy.

Another day, another adventure!!!

Love, Penny

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Thank you, thank you, thank you....

2010-03-09T17:27:00.002-06:00

People are continuing to be so nice to my family.

Every day there is a cheery card or email and often something delicious to eat.

We cannot thank you enough for all your kindness.

Today, though, I am so sad that I cannot go hug my friend, Sharon Pilsch. She was one of the first to come visit me in the hospital, complete with her transplant unit mask and coveralls. She had come from Birmingham after visiting with her husband, Frank, who was awaiting a bone marrow transplant.

It wasn't too much later we ran into Frank at the Cancer Center. He looked fabulous, had a great attitude, we were so thrilled to see how well he was doing.

Frank had his transplant on Friday, March 5th but unfortunately, passed away on Monday, the 8th.

I hurt so much for Sharon and I hurt so much for Gwen Pilsch, who now has lost both her sons, two of the finest guys in Tuscaloosa. I hurt for Amelia Pilsch, widow of Graham, who has faced this before and knows all too well the pain of losing a spouse. I hurt for Erin and Turner, Frank and Sharon's children.

The upside of all of this, if there can be one, is that there are two adorable Pilsch boys waiting to grow up to become the kind of guys their grandfather and uncle were.

Here's to Cullen and Jackson Pilsch!

Love,

Penny

Welllllll..........

2010-03-07T11:27:00.003-06:00

The best laid plans of becoming a more regular blogger have be blindsided by technological difficulties...aka the service has been spotty at home, plus a diversion on the health side of things.

Thursday, with all good intentions of returning the wig, taking less than 15 minutes in the cancer center, and then perhaps enjoying the first REAL day of somewhat warmer weather, turned into one of those truly unpredictable days.

I knew I'd been feeling a little breathless on Wednesday, but as we got ready to go to CC at around 11, I totally had no energy....like Jonathan had to put my arms around his neck and lift me, like a dead weight, onto the walker and push me through the jungle known as our garage to get me in the car.

He was moments before calling an ambulance. I begged him not to.

We finally made it to the CC and found out, why yes, Penny, your hemoglobin levels are LOW.

You need two units of blood, thank you very much, along with some platelets.

So we waited. We always know it is a waiting game with the blood. We waited some more. And, we waited.

There had been a trauma in the ER....I could only get one unit of blood and the platelets on Thursday.

Did you know it takes about two hours for blood to go in? When you're in the hospital, it doesn't matter what time they start it. 8:00 p.m. can be just fine because, I mean, where are you going to go anyway?

Starting blood at the CC in the late afternoon means you are last to leave. Like, at 7:00 p.m. Like, after you've been there since 11:00 a.m.

Thank heavens for Kindles and laptops.

Then we were back on Friday at 7:30 for the second unit of blood. Ahhhh, the fun just never ends!

Wigging out.......

2010-03-04T08:24:00.002-06:00

Being a person of large head circumference, wig shopping is proving, uhhhhh, difficult.

Yesterday Mama and I ventured into the boutique at the Cancer Center for the first time. It was time to face my fear. What wig would possibly look decent on top of my Dopey bald head?

Answer? Ummm, not many. The wigs that look so cute on the styrofoam head-lets sat on the top of my head like a bad toupe. Seriously. I think those styrofoam head-lets were modeled from five year olds. Very disconcerting.

Many of the wigs I tried on that had cute cuts really made me look like a large woman in a Mickey Mouse t-shirt, the kind of woman that shouldn't have short hair OR be wearing that t-shirt. Cruel, but true.

That cute cut just got lost on the volume of my head. I might have even been the original model for the bowling ball, I don't know.

We found one that made me sort of happy but I had that gut feeling about it. It was "ok" but not great. Of course, my mother loved it. We have always had "hair wars" since I was little so I was growing even more suspicious by the minute.

You see, my mother is blessed with this beautiful hair. It has always been gorgeous, she has always worn it in a certain style, which suits her well. It is just that that style doesn't suit me as well. But it is hard to explain that. This wig closely resembled her style and I KNEW my other two hair critics, Katie and MK, were going to say.

There were no words. Only looks.

The wig is being returned today.

Love,

Penny

More moo goo gai pan.....

2010-03-03T09:40:00.002-06:00

Yowser, that SWEN moo goo gai pan really hits the spot!

We were in and out of the cancer center in literally MINUTES! A first! Easy when you don't need anything but two quick shots in the belly.

We had grabbed some wonderful gift cards to Zoes and Newks, thinking that's what we'd have for lunch but realized it was too cold for salad or "non hot" foods...so SWEN was the destination.

Then it took HOURS to warm up, even by the fire and with my red power blanket wrapped around my feet. For a girl struggling with her inner thermostat, anyway, I thought I'd never get warm, but finally did.

Now I see that the sun is very deceiving as it is still cold outside and I need to venture to the cancer center again in about an hour.

Other than that, things are progressing as "to be expected". I might have good blood days (red) but still get that chemo tired feeling. One just never knows.

Did enjoy a short marathon of "White Collar" on USA network the other day. Yeah, I had thought Neal Cafferty (main character's name) might just be a little too "pretty boy" from the previews I had seen but have decided that I was WRONG. I just wish the show came on at 8 instead of 9. I'm usually snoozing pretty hard by 9!

Have a warmer day, y'all!

Love,

Penny

A little catching up...

2010-03-02T09:19:00.002-06:00

Hi y'all!

Sorry, I've just seemed to be allergic to my computer lately. If I open it it means that I should read, or respond, or just relate something, all of which I haven't seemed to want to do much of.

Remember, it isn't you....it is just me, going through this strange new experience.

I had a good week where my appetite picked up, with desires for specific tastes, which were met with great delight! I have seen same said appetite decrease so that I can make three meals out of one sometimes, which has been a tad beneficial for my back side!

This week has been a bit of a switchover to "sort of queasy/I need a zofran" and the search for good liquid refreshment, not of an alcoholic variety. The old taste buds had sort of screwed around with soft drink tastes, water isn't so fun, so I'm not sure what I need/want. Limeade? Cranapple?

I know I need a lot more of it, whatever it is, as well as having the need for a heated vat of the most luxurious body cream I can find. And I'm talking BATHTUB sized vat since my skin has turned to tissue paper and I need to just sit in this tub all day, maybe with and IV of Atarax. Now that would be just a little bit of HEAVEN!!!!

This is the last week of four day visits to CTC....then next week, if I'm not in the hospital, it will be just a two day visit.

Hope all my buddies at Cottontail Village have a great show this coming weekend! This is so weird, the first time in seven years I haven't been. I should be loading my car and going up there tomorrow afternoon but just not going to happen.

And, Mary-Keeley has a big birthday coming up on Sunday! This cancer shit has smashed all our original plans for her birthday....a visit to see Alice in Wonderland in 3D.....a Mad Hatter's party for her friends and is threatening to mess with Plan B...a quiet evening at home with steaks and some homemade crepes with Nutella, very French-y.

So, if y'all want to do some praying, pray for me to be able to stay at home through this Sunday!

Love,

Penny

Shingles, not of the roofing kind....

2010-02-24T10:22:00.002-06:00

Well, after a relatively easy day yesterday (i.e., feeling rested and well after ALL that sleep) we went to the Cancer Treatment Center for the "easy" shot. Now, why I'm remembering this shot doesn't hurt, I don't know because yesterday it was a "stangin".

Then we discovered that I have a little case of the shingles. Damn. If it isn't one thing, it is another. So far it hasn't hurt too badly and I think we caught it on day one.

Did have more of an appetite yesterday and it was the SWEN moo goo gai pan that made the difference. That was some tasty fare!

After that, I sort of tuckered out and spent the rest of the day in bed. I'm just having to take the attitude that my body is telling me what I need to be doing, though I do know I need to be getting some more exercise.

Jelly legs could be my new name. Who knew stepping over a threshold could be so HARD????

Sorry for the delay in posts.....

2010-02-23T07:19:00.002-06:00

Home again, home again has been some wonderful medicine.

LOTS of sleep has been on the agenda. And I mean LOTS.

We are now transitioning into our Cancer Treatment Center routine. Yesterday was a "long" day with Dr. visit (things are progressing as expected), chemo treatment, two shots, and finishing with the lumbar shot of methotrexate. It was nice to be told to come home and stay flat for the next 24 hours after that.

At least I can report that the "high anxiety" level of getting that lumbar shot a month ago is now "nill".

It is nice to get back on track with a little normalcy, though I love and miss my nurses and friends at DCH.

Normally, at this time of year, I would be frantically trying to get ready for Cottontail Village in Bham. Paint, stain, glitter, strings would be covering the house. I would be worried about having enough to take, my helper Jamie would be calming me down.

Perhaps God just knew I needed to recharge my soul.

Love,

Penny

Home again, home again, jiggety jig!

2010-02-18T04:45:00.003-06:00

YEA!!!!! Will be going home this morning, we hope! That is usually the plan. Keep your fingers crossed!

All my "counts" have really improved, especially my white counts which had put me back here in the first place.

I don't know what time all this will take place....sometimes it happens quickly, other times it might drag on a bit.

Just can't wait to be home again!

A belated Valentine message.....

2010-02-17T06:03:00.001-06:00

Dreaming big....a musical interlude

2010-02-16T18:31:00.005-06:00

Do you know the music from this musical theatre production from the late 70's?

If not, you should. Period. Don't argue with me.

The music was written by two members of ABBA, lyrics by Tim Rice. How could this be bad?

Today, while bopping around youtube, I found a video of somebody who dreamed big, in a HUGE way.

Susan Boyle. And no, this is NOT a recap of her Britain's Got Talent video. It is one that I was shocked and excited to see.

Before Susan Boyle, frumpy as could be, opened her mouth to let forth that voice, Simon asked her what she would like to do. Paraphrased, "have a career like Elaine Paige."

Do you remember the audience reaction? Shock, not even benign amusement.

This dowdy, frumpy woman wanted a career like Elaine Paige? The doyenne of musical theatre in Britain? The woman who had originated the roles of Cats, Chess, Evita in West End theatre?

Well, folks, I'm here to tell you. Susan Boyle can hold her own with Miss Paige. Big Time.

Here's to dreaming big.....oh, and in case you didn't make the connection between Chess and the video below, it is a song from Chess, one of the most beautiful of many. And THIS is what Susan Boyle got to sing with Elaine Paige for their first time singing together.

OMG.

Here's to big dreams!

Just gotta talk about being PFATT......LONG

2010-02-16T06:39:00.003-06:00

First, the daily health update.

Reporting from DCH, our trusty Penny McAllister, not far from her cup of coffee.

Dr. Hinton reported yesterday that "numbers were up" in all areas, especially white counts. Penny hasn't had enough coffee to remember the number but David is an "early" visit doctor so may see him in few minutes and can update some more.

Penny walked down the hall a little bit yesterday so she wouldn't think about the total body itch, cause unknown but suspected to be antibiotics, which can't be discontinued at the moment. She also found out much strength she has lost in her legs because she couldn't walk as far this week as she did on her first walk. Get out of the bed, Penny!

A dermatologist has been in for a consult and guess what. He put Penny back on prednisone. Not as much as before but the girls could tell a difference last night when they brought HOT POPPY SEED CHICKEN out to her for supper. DIVINE!!! Plus, she had an appetite, probably due to the prednisone she had had yesterday. WHY does this drug have to be so BAD for you but do such GOOD things in so many ways?????

As you can tell from an some earlier entries that I am a member of a group of artist friends on ebay who go by the acronym of PFATT, or Primitive Folk Art Tea & Talk.

I need to let you know more about them and I hope this won't offend any of my local "sisters" in art, of which I have MANY.

Flashback to the late 90's. Computers were becoming more commonplace in homes. Digital cameras were starting to appear.

In addition, there was still an interest in the crafting world in, well, crafts, but some folks were beginning to move away from the 80's look and raising the bar, or at least changing the way the bar looked. New, fun, wacky styles. People who colored outside the lines.

The first name that comes to mind is Sonja Sandel aka Hickety Pickety. I would run to the grocery store to look through the pattern ads in the crafting magazines to see what she had done. Her patterns and newsletters were a "stitch" to read. There no rules. Just have fun. How freeing! One day I summoned the courage to call her phone number to ask a question about a pattern and SHE answered. I was in shock and awe, to say the least. We conversed for a while and finally got to meet about three years later. Sonja is a great lady who has "left the business" as she puts it, but she was a PIONEER in putting a certain "look" on merchandise in the marketplace. If I'd had one pint of her blood, I guarantee that it would be kicking this leukemia's ass, because she's that kind of woman.

As more and more women gravitated to having computers at home, new worlds opened up. People like Sonja started "selling" sites where you could "meet and greet" and learn from other artists and also have a venue to show your work and sell it. One of the other first groups like this was called "Folk of Art", started by Jenn Steffa (aka folkgirl7). She started a "forum" that really caught on and lots of "early adopters" of computers/art/crafting and ebay sellers started out on that forum. It was so great....you suddenly were "meeting" lots of women, all over the US (and world) who "understood" what you loved to do and could talk to them whenver you were online together, be it 3:00 a.m. or 10:30 p.m.

I won't go through the rest of the history of how groups started popping up everywhere. Just know that they did. I remember telling someone on the FOA board that this was just the "tip of the iceberg" re: women, crafting, handmade goods, etc. It just felt like a "revolution" or sorts was brewing.

Brewing it was, because now there are groups everywhere, magazines devoted to the art of scrapbooking, dollmaking, wearable art. The Somerset magazines are divine. Where Women Create is pure eye candy.
I could go on and on. Things that would have been impossible to find ten years ago. Conventions where artists meet other artists like themselve, learn new skills, make new friends, learn from the leaders in the field. Special websites for ONLY handmade goods, such as Etsy have popped up.

I guess, what I'm trying to say is that this artist/crafter movement has allowed so many women to be noticed, appreciated for their talent, all while staying home and taking care of families. The best of both worlds, maybe? I think so. And even better is the fact that these women have learned (or are learning) how to promote themselves and their artwork. I just LOVE it!

So what does this have to do with my PFATT sisters and this tree that is up for auction?

I was invited to join PFATT at a low time, professionally for me, by Christy Meyers. I wasn't selling on ebay anymore because I had let myself become intimidated. She knew that but wanted me to be a part of the PFATT family, a decision I've never regretted. Sweet, wonderful women, diverse in their talent and style, a joy to be a part.

But the best part of groups like this is when you get to actually MEET people in the group, an opportunity I took two years ago when the "PFATT PFEST 2008" was held in the NoCal area. OMG, what a fabulous time! Napa, San Francisco, Alameda flea market, touring the whole area, lots of lemon drops, laughter, tears, etc. And this was only eleven out of 50 of us. Again, I could go on and on, but I won't. Maybe later, though....

And these are the women who instigated, planned, organized, made, donated their time, talents, and artistry to bring you the PFATT Penny Feather Tree. Many of them have never met me and wanted to do this. Many of them HAVE met me and STILL wanted to do this! LOL!

Bless the Pfatties, one and all.

Love,
Penny

Ornament tree auction has begun!

2010-02-15T07:55:00.003-06:00

I was going to blog about it last night but fell asleep quicker than I thought I would.

The ebay auction has begin! Click here to see it!

Anyone is welcome to bid on it! All proceeds going to the Alabama chapter of the Lymphoma and Leukemia society.

2010-02-15T01:57:00.002-06:00

Yeah, peeps....for all practical purposes, it has been that kind of weekend.

Everything that has blithely seemed ignore me, chemo reaction - wise, has turned up in Room 221

Here's hoping to a better second half of February, 2010!

Promises, promises.....

2010-02-12T05:23:00.002-06:00

Yeah, those weathermen make hollow promises to us all the time.

Monroeville to get 2-4", now they've changed T-Town to a "dusting"?

Even though I can't get out and enjoy it, I at least wanted to look out my window and SEE SNOW!!!!

I'm just going to have to turn off this darn TV and forget about it. Probably could have even had school today, not that that matters one whit to me anymore.

But, I know it has to be frustrating for those involved in making those kinds of decisions....Yes? No? Maybe? Yes? No?

Up with my cuppa joe, trying to blog a little bit. Slept pretty well but had some new pillows I couldn't beat into submission.

I also stayed on atarax all day yesterday which made for an interesting day of sluggishness.

Waiting for blood test results now. Yesterday was close to needing one unit, and could tell, but they decided to wait until today to see how the red cells were doing...dropping or rising in number.

Had a chemo shot yesterday...asparaginase...aka e coli. (Or has e coli mixed in?) You may recall from earlier posts in December this is the one where the nurse said "We'll give you a little to test your reaction but will have a CRASH CART outside the door in case you go into anaphalactic shock."

WTH? But, it was no problem and has been fine ever since. In fact, I even managed to mess with Nurse Emily's head the other day after she gave me the shot for the first time. I waited long enough and she asked how I felt....so I made a twisted face at her and stiffened my body. Probably shouldn't have done that but I knew that the reaction is almost instantaneous so that's why I waited.

Nurse Stephanie said "Oh, I just new she was going to do something like that....I could tell by the look in her eyes." Poor Emily...she said "WAIT til I've done this 20 times before you pull something like that on me again!"

I start over with "Level 2b" of my chemo on Monday...which is essentially a repeat of what I've done the past four weeks, starting with a spinal of Methotrexate. Last time I had that I was wired for 24 hours and wasn't sure it was from the adrenaline of being scared or the drugs.

I won't be scared this time.

Have fun playing in whatever snow we get!

Love,

Penny

The rest of the pony story......

2010-02-11T05:15:00.001-06:00

I found out from cousins and mama that Aunt Mary gave the pony cart (it WAS Steiff.....DAMN) to Charlotte Woodley for her children Jim and Dollie to use. After that, we don't know what happened to it. DOUBLE DAMN!

So, yesterday, while on a small phenergan trip, I lay in bed imagining that the cart might still be in the basement of the house they lived in in Pinehurst. Or that maybe it was stuck up in some garage rafters or something. Or maybe in a neighbor's basement or attic.

I guess I need to get out my Nancy Drew clothes, start of up my roadster, and get sleuthing!

My mother also added this story....I don't remember it happening but that's not saying it didn't and it does sound just like Frances!

One funny thing that I thought about that pony cart was that Frances Leapard got into it and just rode down the sidewalk one day with you running after her telling her it was your turn.She turned around and told you that she didn't take turns, didn't know what turns were and that you could just wait your turn.

You cried and Bobby (what I called my grandmother Lamont) went over to see Frances's grandmother and she got her out of the cart. Frances had a wonderful collection of toy kitchen furniture on that big front porch and she very quickly told you that you couldn't play with her with the furniture anymore. That ended playing too much with Miss Frances!!

I grew up to work for Bill and Doris Leapard...ahhh the stories, the design, the fascinating rooms upstairs that Bill decorated, the wallpaper books that were kept on the second floor of one of the garages out back......so maybe they didn't know about selfish Miss Frances and the pony cart.

As an aside, I LOVED working at Leapard's, as well as The Collector's Shop. Such fun things to see and do every day!

I turned on the TV for the first time since I got here to check the weather after a nurse had mentioned snow for this weekend. I haven't check this morning, though the weather channel did move from 40% chance of precipitation to 70% as I lay in the bed thinking how glad I'm not at some Baltimore (or nearby) hospital, waiting for my family to come for a visit.

WOW...talk about snow! I have a friend, Joanne Harper, that lives around York/Lancaster, PA area. She can already open the windows of her house and reach out and grab snow, it is that high. And that was just yesterday, before the next round was supposed hit.

Debby Brown, are you ok? Debby lives in Valley Forge.

Healthwise, I got some potassium through my pik line yesterday, so NO BURN. After struggling with taking just half of the ginormous pills yesterday, my nice nurse decided to order the liquid! Yea for Nurse Stepani!!!

Otherwise, things remain about the same. Low white count. Red fluctuates but haven't need blook transfusion in last couple of days. Platelets I got yesterday plus the extra potassium. Might even feel fit enough to venture and poke my nose outside if it actually DOES snow on Friday! Wow, just saw a map for tomorrow on Weather Channel

Get your taco soup made, girls!

Take care and have a great Thursday!

Love,

Penny

Up and attum!

2010-02-10T06:35:00.002-06:00

Breakfast ordered. Check.

Gmail read. Check.

Bopped around facebook. Check.

Still itching like crazy. Check. (OMG....Katie, I had NO IDEA how miserable you must feel so often. NO IDEA.)

Hoping that a change in bath soap will change the itching. Other than that, I'm going to have to live on Atarax, permanently.

Which will result in my sleeping ALL THE TIME.

Great, and I mean GREAT night of sleep. Check.

Tell me, is it Wednesday or Thursday? Inquiring minds want to know!

Love,

Penny

Phenny Penergan...oops make that Penny Phenergan.

2010-02-09T16:45:00.002-06:00

What a woozy day today! Phenergan, twice. Zofran, once, three imodium.

Yes, three.

They have started up again on stripping floors in the corridor of 2 Southeast (oncology wing). They did this last night from 4:30-11:p.m.

I can deal with the noise but the smell, to folk that are already hypersensitive to smell, odors, etc., just seems WRONG. Bur what can I do? Hmmmm, I could call Bill Cassels. Yeah, that's the ticket.

I woke up this a.m. feeling pretty good. Until I started itching. We don't know whether it is from funky liver enzymes (now going down, thank heavens) or to all the antbiotics I'm taking and maybe developing a sensitivity to that.

Always someting.

Upshot was I got some Atarax which promplty made my sleepy again. Top that off with another dose later and the two phenergans and one zofran and I was just part of the bed. Couldn't peel me off if you wanted to.

My mom sent me another funny story about the pony cart. I'll share it tomorrow!

Love,

Penny

So, I keep thinking WHY am I so TIRED???

2010-02-08T04:53:00.002-06:00

Well, duhh, Penny. You have leukemia.

You are getting chemo.

Both will make you TIRED. Really, really TIRED.

GET OVER IT! Understand it. Move on.

Or, so I keep telling myself.

Yesterday was another tired day, due to lack of sleep on Saturday night. I think I made up for that last night. I feel much better this a.m.

I rallied after some phenergan. Miracle stuff, that phenergan. So, by 4ish, I was feeling better.

Read for a little while. (A W.E.B. Griffin novel set in WWII, New Orleans, Argentina, spies, Germans, etc--one of my favorite kinds of "reads".)

I was especially interested in it because during the end of the war, my uncle, Jim Marlow, happened to be in New Orleans where they were having an auction of stuff that had been on its way to the ex-pat Germans in Argentina for Christmas.

I can't remember if the ship (submarine) had been captured but I don't think it would have been blown up or the items wouldn't have been intact.

He brought home pony cart that could be pedaled. The pony was a huge stuffed animal, I think a Steiff. We (my cousins, Rudd and Jimmy) and neighbors (Polly, Vicki, Ellen Newton) would pedal that thing all around 15th Avenue. The legs moved the pony like it was picking them up and putting them down. A magnificent toy.

I wish I knew what happened to it.

I wish I could pedal it right out of the hospital today...or at least up and down the halls!

Take care and have a wonderful Monday.

Love,

Penny

Sleepyhead jones day

2010-02-06T07:25:00.002-06:00

I cannot wake up this morning! All I want to do is pull my mask down over my face and sleep some more.

I think I will!

I did have to have my groshong pulled yesterday and a "pik line" put in my upper arm. At least it is giving blood easily. SO FAR. I just have to figure out how to maneuver regular clothes over this thing so I won't have to revert to the awful gowns. UGH.

Maybe some reading before I shut down for my morning nap.

Don't be jealous. Remember, I'll be happy to trade places with you~

Love,

Penny

As for my health agenda, today......

2010-02-05T06:20:00.002-06:00

LOW BLOOD, again. Probably two units later.

My magic Groshong port is acting up so I have to go down for a dye contrast on it to make sure it isn't leaking where it isn't supposed to be. May have to get another line in my upper arm. BUMMER.

Waiting for seven minutes before I can call for breaky. Really enjoying the eggs over easy. At least I know I'm starting the day with good protein.

Have been reading my Kindle a LOT since I couldn't get on computer until this a.m. Finished one David Robicheaux novel (main character) and also one book by Harlen Cohen. Thanks Pam, for suggesting those! Am now on second Harlen Cohen novel, as I got a deal on a "two-fer" from Amazon.

Off to look up one of our book club books, by Gin Phillips. Title escapes me at the moment. Susan McCarthy said she was Eudora Welty-like in her writing so that is intriguing to me!

Hopefully I can get on computer again later today so I can report in.

Love,

Penny

Pandora, pandora....send Mr. Jobim right over!

2010-02-05T05:57:00.009-06:00

Ahhhh, yes. Pandora on my iPhone did make for a pleasant afternoon yesterday! Thanks, MK for helping Meme and me out!

I did a Diana Krall channel and caught lots of faves that way--Michael Buble, Ella Fitzgerald, Norah Jones all appeared on the DK station.

But....for total drifting away I put on my Carlos Jobim channel. Totally in love with this Brazilian composer. Anything he writes, sung by anyone, I love. For example, I just discovered this version of my favorite Jobim song, Corcovado (Quiet Nights) sung by Queen Latifah.

I LOVE Queen Latifah and this is a really nice version! After hearing her sing with Rod Stewart on his standards cds, I knew she would do great in this genre!

internet malfunction

2010-02-04T16:06:00.002-06:00

The wireless at DCH is not allowing mom's laptop to connect...hence no blogs from her today...

I've encouraged her to post from her mini-laptop (iPhone) so hopefully she will. I downloaded Pandora on both Mom and Meme's iPhones today, so I imagine they are both lounging in room 221, feet kicked up, white cords from both ears, resting their eyes to Michael Buble, Diana Krall or even the Police*- as Meme requested.

still no net......

2010-02-03T17:12:00.000-06:00

Sorry, folks, Short and sweet will have to for the moment.

Not awake enough to gauge how i'm feeling this morning. Waiting to get blood drawn
out of my Groshong port so we'll know the "lay of the land" today. Will probably need platelets for sure.

They just brought me some coffee so let me go get a sip or three.

Back later.

Love,
Penny

Love, Penny

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

Vampires and chemo........

2010-02-01T06:27:00.003-06:00

Got my blood yesterday but didn't take that walk. I will make up for it today and take two walks. I stayed in bed while I got my blood....my bed was very toasty and warm and felt very nice....and did get up to eat but crawled back in the bed for the rest of the evening.

Getting blood always makes me think of being a vampire....I understand them (fictional though they are) so much better now!

This might be TMI for some of you, others might be interested so I thought I would at least share (and clarify) what I'm facing chemo-wise for the next several months. Ummm, make that next couple of years.

My most intensive chemo, meaning I go to the Cancer Treatment Center, will run through the end of May. Some weeks, it is a couple of times, other weeks, four times a week. Those four day weeks usually involve just a couple of shots, so it isn't like I'm sitting there for some long infusion. Plus, once we discovered that scheduling the shots for 1:00 means easier parking, and more "in and out" and back home again, it isn't so bad to think about. The only thing that throws that off is if I need blood. THEN the fun begins! A short trip becomes a long afternoon.

In March I will have 12 days of radiation on my brain, a preventative sort of treatment.

I will have a period, in April, where I will go once a week for an infusion as well as a treatment I receive through my spine. The first time I had to do the spinal thing, I was a nervous WRECK. Now that I know what it is like, it won't be so bad. Plus, the room is really warm and feels good and the radiologist that did it the first time had a very soothing voice. It's the little things, folks, that can make a HUGE difference.

Then, starting in June, I go to a once a month visits at CTC. These will continue for two years after my initial diagnosis, so we're looking at December, 2012 as an ending date. This, of course, is assuming that I behave and that the chemo is kicking ass and that I haven't relapsed or something.

All of this is accompanied by oral chemo that I will be taking but at least I, and now you, know sort of how my life is scheduled out.

Also, got my sleeping meds an hour early and it made a HUGE difference to get an extra hour of good sleep before the shift change and the activities that surround that....temp, blood pressure, etc. I just keep my sleep mask on and hold out my arm now....it is great!

Peace out!

Love,

Penny

In just a fortnight......

2010-01-31T12:14:00.005-06:00

There will be an auction on ebay for a FABULOUS decorative tree filled with handmade ornaments made in my honor by my PFATT sisters!

No, no, PFATT doesn't mean FAT. It stands for Primitive Folk Art Tea & Talk, an ebay group of PFABULOUS artists. I'm very proud to say that I am part of that group!

They have come together, members donating their time and talent, to create the beautiful ornaments that adorn the tree. It would make a PERFECT Valentine's decoration in your home, though it is not limited to a "heart" theme. It includes a monkey, lots of ladybugs, and other kinds of delicious things with lots of red and white and black and white polka dots.

Very Penny.

All the proceeds from the auction are being donated to the Lymphoma and Leukemia Society.

I believe the auction starts on February 14 but will keep you updated. In the meanwhile, please visit the Pfatt Blog to see a slide show of the tree and some of the 30 ornaments that will adorn it. It is mind boggling!

Why?.....

2010-01-31T09:09:00.005-06:00

I thought I would try to answer a little more in depth about why I've been gone from the blog for so long.

As I said in my last post, my mind has really been in a mental pinball machine....bouncing around, landing in one slot or the other, then slowly rolling to the bottom, the operator not caring how many points she was losing.

Every once in a while she'd attempt to get back into the game, but it was just too hard. Too much mental effort, sometimes too much physical effort. She was not playing a "mean pinball."

Low blood will do that to you.....and that is what I've been struggling with. Even today, I realized I REALLY wanted to stay in the bed, after doing all that walking and sitting up yesterday.

Sure enough, my blood was as low as the day I was admitted, so will be getting two units today. Will be feeling perky enough to take another walk this afternoon. It is AMAZING how quickly a blood transfusion will turn your energy level around!

Part of me has also been like Greta Garbo...."I vant to be alone." Again, so I can sort through the mental but also deal with some of the OTHER physical things that have been happening to me as a result of the chemo. My first really "negative" effects. It is hard to want to be around folks when you feel like you have to suddenly jump up and run off to the bathroom, hoping you'll make it in time.

I also used this time to really fall in LOVE with my Kindle. (And yes, I know the iPad just came out but I'm not lusting after that, YET). I was able to get a giant David Baldacci "fix" by downloading three of his books I had not read: True Blue, First Family, and Last Man Standing and then devour them. Ahhhhhhh......it was like a giant brain enema. Sorry, I know that sounds gross, but getting involved in the seedy underbelly of Washington, DC and surrounding areas, with some strong kick ass women characters was just what I needed. Plus, part of First Family is set in Alabama, so that was kind of fun, too.

As for all the unanswered emails, I can only apologize for that. I had days when I never picked up my computer. I just didn't want to be overwhelmed. Sometimes I would open the computer, only to close it up. I think I had one day, out of all the days I was home, that I even felt like reading emails and responding to some of them. So it isn't/wasn't YOU, email writers, facebook messagers. It was ME. Trying to cope the best way I could.

I'm having to deal with the fact that I really have a LONG road ahead. I know because I put my whole chemo schedule into my iPhone calendar yesterday. I got it up to December 2010 and stopped because I didn't think I could bear to continue on for the 24 months AFTER 2010 that I will be taking a treatment at least once a month, barring any unforseen happenings.

Speaking of treatments, another large part of this last month has been getting used to going to the Cancer Center. Some days it is a piece of cake. Other days, it can be long and drawn out, depending on whether I need blood or not. Then, there's the getting ready to go, going, waiting, getting treatment, coming home, or, like my last trip, being admitted to the hospital from there. It is always a surprise. It can be wearing on the soul and the body for the patient and the person who takes me, which has been Jonathan, for the most part.

And lastly, whether in a fit of just feeling "pissy" or jealous or something, I got mad yesterday at the fact that I cannot take off this "leukemia" like it was a coat or something and go do something fun, if only for 24 hours. Or, two.

It is with me, 24/7.

It controls me.

I am not in control.

And it sucks.

So, if one day you ask "Is there anything you need? Anything I can do?" and I reply, "Yeah, you can switch places with me this week", just know it isn't directed at you.

I'm just jealousssssss.

If you don't get the sentence above, maybe this clip will help. I love me some Napoleon Dynamite!

'Ears to ya!.....or how I thought I was at Disneyworld for a minute...

2010-01-31T07:51:00.003-06:00

One thing that has now been fully revealed to the world, since I'm now bald, is that my ears stick out somewhat. Ok, maybe more than "somewhat" but not like my mom's ears. That's not being mean, it is just the truth. Plus, I had to get my ears from somebody, didn't I?

They stick out enough that when I was little and she would give me a bath and pull my hair up in the shampoo suds that I was a dead ringer for Dopey. Yes, that Dopey, of the seven dwarves, Dopey.

She even had (still has) this old plastic bath toy of Dopey that used to sit on the tub on a rubber suction cup. I loved it.

So, I'm getting in the shower at the hospital, the warming light is on in the bathroom and when I move a little bit in one direction, there appears this shadow. Of Dopey.

"What the hell?" I'm thinking.....and then realize that the shadow is of MY head. NOT Dopey!

I think it might be time for me to start on a serious search for a wig!

I'm sorry I've been absent from blogland for so long. It has been a mental and physical thing for me.

Part of me has been bouncing around in a mental pinball machine. What do I do now? How do I act? How am I supposed to "be"?

I'm certainly not the same person who many of you saw in the hospital before...like Mark McGuire, I was hepped up on steroids. Manic. Driven. In denial. Feeling like there wasn't anything I couldn't do or accomplish. "Leukemia" seemed to be just a word, not a disease. I didn't feel bad, I didn't feel "sick". I actually felt better than I had in YEARS. Thanks, steroids.

Coming off those, as you've read, was HORRIBLE.

So I guess I'm now in phase "two" of the "new normal".

Learning to cope.

Love,

Penny

Had A Good Morning

2010-01-30T15:39:00.002-06:00

Penny had a good morning today. Doctor Dubay came by. Penny talked a mile a minute while he was there. He wants her to get up, sit in a chair, put on a mask and walk up and down the 2nd floor hall. So that's what we did.

Once home, the doc wants Penny to do what she would normally do when she's at home. If she gets tired, just quit what she's doing and rest. That's not quite the same as "rest when you feel bad, and rest when you feel good". I didn't think to mention that to the doc when he was there. Then again, Penny was utilizing every second he was there to tell him how she felt and ask him questions, so even had I thought to ask, I'm not sure I would have been able to get in on the conversation.

She requested Chinese from Swen again. Ate about a third of it.

Jonathan

Let Me Rephrase That!

2010-01-29T21:18:00.001-06:00

I spent the morning with Penny, and Meme arrived around lunch time.

Friday

2010-01-29T20:39:00.002-06:00

I spent the morning with Penny, then her mama. I think Mary-Keeley popped in on her way back to work. Not sure about the afternoon and evening...I had to work.

Penny was so-so this morning. Not terrible, not good. Somewhere in that middle ground. She passed on ordering lunch while I was there. Maybe she changed her mind and ordered something later. Don't know about dinner.

I just got in from working and I don't have a whole lot more I can give you tonight.

Jonathan

Thursday

2010-01-28T18:27:00.002-06:00

Meme spent most of the day with Penny today. Plus, the girls came out and had lunch with her. They were having a grand 'ol time when I arrived as they were all three snarfing down some pretty delicious food from The Patio...the eatin' place downstairs at DCH. I was just back from Mississippi, so I joined Meme downstairs for lunch while the Katie, Mary-Keeley, and Penny ate and laughed.

All in all a very good day for Penny. Under her direction, Meme and the girls spruced the place up a bit. Putting this and that where it goes. Penny should be a hospital room designer. One thing is for sure, she wants her stuff where she wants her stuff. Now that's my Penny.

I wasn't with Penny for a long time today, but Meme says the new room, sunlight, bathing, dressing, reading her Kindle, good food, laughter, children, very handsome husband, visits from Jim Woodson and Catherine Collier from Christ Episcopal Church, made for a good day in room 221... featuring Penny Lamont McAllister.

Jonathan

Penny' Day

2010-01-27T19:11:00.002-06:00

Penny's mom, Joyce (Meme), spent almost the entire day with Penny, as the girls and I all had to work. She should be posting, but since she doesn't know how, I'll do it for her. Meme is gettin' pretty good with her new iPhone. Although she said she had been texting me all day with updates, only to find out she had programmed into her phone an incorrect phone number for my cell. I wonder who received all those texts?

Penny had a slight fever from the moment we checked into the hospital yesterday until late this afternoon, and has been cold, no matter how many blankets are pilled on top of her. She moved from a north facing room to a south facing room this afternoon and likes it a lot better. Sun, sun, sun...and a better view. Not that she's jumping up to look out the window. Anyway, she was feeling much better by the time I arrived around 5:00. Not great, mind you, but better.

She was to get blood this evening, and of course they have been continuing with the scheduled chemo treatments. One more tomorrow, and that's it for the week.

We march on.

Jonathan

Our special boy

2010-01-27T14:15:00.001-06:00

"momma, I will stay here and keep the couch warm for you until you get to come home and play wiff me". Love, Henry

"mommma, I will be sure to keep up with my tricks and I'll show you when you get home." love, Ollie

Peace. MK.

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

Some pictures!

2010-01-27T14:09:00.001-06:00

From her first day home January 2. For your viewing pleasure. Looking goooood!!

Peace. MK.

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

All Settled In

2010-01-26T19:51:00.002-06:00

Penny is all settled in at DCH. She has all her favorite blankets, pillows, and the three sets of plastic 'shelf looking things' containing tons of girl stuff.

She wasn't feeling all that great when I left her, but she knows she is in good hands on 2nd floor DCH.

I've got to work the next couple of days, so maybe one of my beautiful daughters will keep you guys informed for a while.

Jonathan

Back To Hospital

2010-01-26T13:02:00.002-06:00

At cancer center now. Just found out we're going back to DCH hospital for probably 10 days or so. Dr. feels there's no point in sending Penny home at this point. Better to keep an eye on her 24/7 for now.

More later.

Jonathan

Visit With Doctor Hinton

2010-01-25T20:38:00.002-06:00

We spent from 9:00 'til 4:45 at the cancer center today. We met with Dr. Hinton, got chemo, and a pint of blood. Doesn't seem like that would take so long, does it? But it does.

There was a nice gentleman, with his wife, next to us today. It was obvious it was his first day at the cancer center. The DCH cancer center staff were so nice to them, taking all the time necessary to explain what's taking place, etc., just as they continue to be with Penny. They are wonderful.

Dr. Hinton said we are entering a phase in Penny's treatment where she will be particularly susceptible to infection and fever. We are to even more tightly restrict visitors at home to protect her from whatever might walk though the door, and we are to monitor her temp very closely. We are back on antibiotics, just to be safe. He also warned us to not be surprised if he orders us back to DCH hospital for a few days at some point this week. Better to have Penny under twenty four hour care at DCH if she catches something and her temp begins escalating. I agree with the doctor. And Penny understands fully and is quite prepared to return if need be.

I asked Dr. Hinton if things were going according to plan with Penny. His response was everything is just fine. She's responding exactly as he expected. So, we're right on track with this damn disease and the treatment. So far, so good.

Penny rarely checks her MacBook these days, but every once in a while she asks for it. So keep sending your love, even if you aren't getting a reply. In fact, I caught her checking her email just yesterday morning.

Jonathan

See Doctor Tomorrow

2010-01-24T21:12:00.002-06:00

Over eight hours of sleep last night. Chemically induced.

Weak this morning. Ate a little left over Chinese with the girls. More rest. Then Penny's mama came over with roast pork, squash, peas, and rice. Penny ate at the kitchen table with us and loved it. Then immediately back on the sofa, and quickly back to her bed.

My question for Dr. Hinton tomorrow will be, "How's she doing, Doc? Is this plan doing what you want it to do?"

Yours truly,

The Husband

Sorry. It's Me Again. The Husband

2010-01-23T19:12:00.002-06:00

Penny had a good day today. Spent the morning on the sofa reading her Kindle. Wanted Chinese for lunch, but didn't eat much.

She actually got about 4 1/2 hours of uninterrupted sleep last night! That's a good sign. Tonight we're going for more!

Watched a movie this afternoon (500 Days of Summer...or something like that). Had a nice bath, got her legs shaved (ooo--la-la), and completely lotioned up. It was like we were on a date!

Sorry you guys have been stuck with my posts these last few days. She had the computer in her lap today, but...

Jonathan

A Phone Call

2010-01-21T21:36:00.002-06:00

Penny got the last for four shots today...for this week. A giant thanks to her mama for taking her.

Penny is still very tired almost all day. And she's not her usual scrappy self. (The girls and I can get away with almost anything we want.)

Then, a cancer survivor friend of hers calls to pick up her spirits. I couldn't hear the conversation, but Penny seemed much better afterwards. A huge, huge thanks for that call.

The doctors have a plan, and we're following it. But geeeezzzz...

Penny's Day

2010-01-20T18:10:00.002-06:00

Penny spent the morning at home with her mom watching over her. Ate a bit, but mostly trying to sleep in her bed after a not so restful night. Not sure why, but she just couldn't sleep much last night.

I took over around lunch, and we had a rather uneventful afternoon. Then the cancer center called about 4:00 PM and asked why we had not shown up for her SHOT. Turns out the 'check out' counter did not have Penny's shots for Wednesday and Thursday on their calendar, so when we checked out yesterday we were told not to return until the 25th. Both Penny and I mentioned that we thought she was to have four shots this week, Mon - Thurs. "Can you double check please"?

Anyway, instead of a bath, we piled in the car and headed to the cancer center for her shot. The nurses apologized, we got her shot, and headed back home. Now she's had a hot bath and is curled up on the sofa with two Bichons.

There are too many people to thank for the wonderful food that constantly streams to our home, so please know that we love and appreciate every bit of it. And for those of you outside the deep south, when someone is sick down here, people bring FOOD. Last night we had fresh gumbo from the gulf coast. And this afternoon a wonderful neighbor brought over a cheesecake. That just might be dinner tonight. Cheesecake!!

I'm sure Penny will be posting again real soon. I'm nudging her in that direction. Ever so gently.

Be patient.

Jonathan

I'd say a good day!

2010-01-19T20:10:00.002-06:00

Penny was up before me today, sitting in the den, with a cup of coffee in her hand! Wow! But by the time we left for treatment she was giving out of steam.

Got more blood today, more chemo, and then a spinal. EEeeewwwww...

Much stronger tonight, thank goodness. We've been told to 'rest when you feel bad, and rest when you feel good'.

We go back on the 25th. Until then, home meds, and rest.

What wonderful friends we have. Love to all of you.

Jonathan

Quite a day...

2010-01-18T20:49:00.002-06:00

Practically all day at the cancer center. Penny was exhausted, so they gave her a room away from the other's receiving chemo. Complete with bed! Thank God.

Platelets were up, so she could receive chemo, but she needed blood, had a fever, and has some kind of infection that a blood test will identify in TWO days. Hell, I can fly to Europe and back in two days.

Anyway, we're back on antibiotics. It's getting difficult to keep the pill bottles in one bowl.

Now we're home, fever is down, and she's sleeping like a baby.

Jonathan

Sunday

2010-01-17T18:12:00.000-06:00

Hi all.

Mom has had a relaxing day. She is looking and feeling better everyday, drastically different than this time last week. She's having Saltines and watching Golden Globes red carpet on E!

Mom has a regular checkup at the Cancer Center tomorrow morning and a spinal tap in the afternoon. Ouchhhhhhie!

Thanks for all the thoughts and prayers, keep it up and remember to give thanks, everyday!! Lots of lurrvvvvvv-

Peace. MK.

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

The Hangover

2010-01-15T13:39:00.004-06:00

I came home for lunch today to find Mom still in the bed, curtains closed and lights off. She has been feeling really crappy lately from what we are calling "Prednisone Withdrawls"-not fun my friends. Imagine how you would feel after a month long Spring Break on Bourbon Street? Yeah-that pretty much sums it up. Think the WORST hangover you have ever had times a million. We have all been there. Yuck.

After she smelled the delicious aroma of Chicken and Rice Casserole (thanks Paula Q.!), Mom decided that she might want to get up and eat something. Not having enough energy to make it to the kitchen to eat with us, we made her up a "Princess Tray" filled with yummy food-all topped off with a piece of Red Velvet Cake. This made her happy. After a delicious lunch, time for meds. Then back to sleep.

I have been reading a lot about this so called "Predinsone Withdrawl" and have learned that it may take a while for her to be feeling like her old self. We appreciate all the thoughts, prayers and DELICIOUS goodies-but, for now-need to keep the visiting hours to a minimum (pretty much only family).

MK, Dad and I will be trying to keep you all updated as much as possible. Mom has an appointment at the Cancer Center on Monday. Hopefully they can help us get her back to her old self!

Love, Katie

Not Quite Heath Ledger

2010-01-14T12:19:00.003-06:00

Penny's words exactly,

"I feel like a wilted collard leaf."

She's really been feeling tired, sore, exhausted, outta breath, etc. the past few days and wanted me to let you all know that she's sorry for the few and far between posts.

Mama is back to bed for now, resting her eyes. She tried the couch for a while this morning, but now she's retired to her bedroom. No lunch yet, but we'll keep you all updated for the next few days!

Love,

Learning best laid plans of Doctors and patients...

2010-01-12T15:09:00.002-06:00

Can change with a blo0d draw.

All the fun has been put off until next week!

Today is Dr. Day.....

2010-01-12T06:38:00.002-06:00

Yet another first.

Will they take blood and determine that I need some? (I feel like I do)

Will my yucky lethargy just be part of the prednisone withdrawl?

What will I find out?

Stay tuned and I'll let you know.

But I sure hope I can get to the furniture store to look at some new chairs.

Shopping, always a woman's priority!

Love,

Penny

One month ago, today......

2010-01-11T07:47:00.002-06:00

I woke up in the hospital, having been admitted the night before.

The male nurse that checked us in on the 10th thought I was in for a chemo treatment.

"Ummmm, no, I was just diagnosed with ALL about 45 minutes ago."

And then, that wonderful nurse, Jeremy, proceeded to educate us about the three kinds of leukemia

(Chronic, ALL, AML--all with odd little variations of their own).

And when I say WONDERFUL, Jeremy, like EVERY OTHER NURSE on 2 South, is WONDERFUL.

When it was time to leave his shift, he said, in the kindest voice, "I hope that when I come back at the end of the week, you won't be here." Meaning, I would have the Chronic kind, treatable at home with pills.

Later in the week, when his 11-7 shift started, he walked into the room.

"Umm, Hi, Jeremy....."

But that was ok, because he is such a caring nurse.

And he is from Texas.

And we beat them!

Like Elvis, the Prednisone has left the building.......

2010-01-10T10:11:00.002-06:00

No aches. Just general lethargy, tiredness.

No wonder the athletes are addicted to this stuff.

Off for a nap.

Love,

Penny

Triskaidekaphobia.....NOT in My vocabulary! Don't have it, never will!

2010-01-09T09:43:00.009-06:00

Slept in. Like REALLY slept. NICE

13 13 13 13 13 13

Still basking in the glow of our 13th National Championship. Can't help it.

Grew up here, went to U of A, have never been far from the shadow of Denny Chimes.

Watched Tuscaloosa High School football games played in Denny Stadium, on off weeks for Bama.

Taught at a school that stood in the shadows of that same stadium, until it was torn down to widen the road that takes you straight to our very on Glory Land.

Loved that last night, when the team arrived, the temp was 20 but with wind chill factors, it felt like 13 degrees. People, is that perfect or what? And all those fans that were out there didn't care. They just wanted to show their love, and they did.

I would have linked to the Wikipedia article on

Triskaidekaphobia

but for some reason, unbeknownst to me, I have hidden something on my tool bar and have not figured out how to restore it so I can link easily back to the URL. Perhaps this will make you happy, since I like to send you on "rabbit hunts"

Suffice it to say, that in 1881, some prominent businessman decided to put an end to the superstitions surrounding the number 13 for formed a club called the "Thirteen Club". They sprang up all over the place at the time but then died out.

Ben, don't you think it is time for a revival of this sort?

Love,

Penny

OOOOH, I'm liking this red background......

2010-01-08T10:04:00.003-06:00

It may stay this way for a while.

Power. Life. Red.

I hope Miss Terry is singing this to Nick this morning!

2010-01-08T07:51:00.002-06:00

Because I sure feel this way, as I imagine the rest of the Bama Nation does!

And ladies of a certain age.....did we really think we were THAT cute when we wore these clothes?

Yes, probably.

Or Perhaps We Won.....

2010-01-07T23:27:00.001-06:00

Because of my snazzy game day outfit!!!!!

13, baby, 13

Love, Penny

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Ready to ROLL over Texas!

2010-01-07T16:45:00.002-06:00

Ready for the game!!! So are my lucky elephants!

Give 'em hell, Alabama!!!

Love, Penny

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

Color change for today.....

2010-01-07T06:10:00.001-06:00

Roll, TIDE, Roll!

Hook those Horns and pitch em into the Pacific.

Gonna be an Eeyore sort of day.....or weekend...

2010-01-07T05:58:00.003-06:00

That's the REAL ORIGINAL Eeyore on the left.

He, Pooh, Piglet, Roo, Kanga, and Tigger all now live in the New York Public Library

It will ge an Eeyore kind of weekend for me. I hope you understand.

I am going to try to sleep, except during the game, of course.

Then, I will move like molasses.

Lastly, I will have to learn to say "No, not a good time right now".

This last week has really caught up with me and now I'm paying for it.

Hope you understand.

Emails or Facebook messages welcome as I can get to them when I'm feeling better.

Please save your minutes on calls.

Love to all,

Penny aka Eeyore.

People have been so kind.....

2010-01-06T05:02:00.003-06:00

And I know I have been been late in mentioning names, gifts, flowers, cards and more that I've been blessed to receive. I've been keeping a list.

Jonathan's checking it twice.

I have to stop for a minute to talk about a most timely gift that arrived yesterday from Janet Crowder and Phyllis Ward.

Though I never taught with Janet or Phyllis, per se, I've known them for years. I did have Rachel and Zach Ward at Verner when I was in the library. Janet has been and excellent teacher in the system for years and they both made the American Studies program at the Tuscaloosa City School system an outstanding one.

A knock on the door and in walks Janet, with JUST the perfect thing at the PERFECT time!

An extra large African made straw basket, huge red/straw stripes. My eyes bugged out at the pattern.

Then, I realized it was the perfect gift for me to carry my things I want/need to do, but might need to move to another room to do them...my computer, phone, new magazines/catalogs, notebook, and other things. PERFECT in every way!

Thank you Janet and Phyllis....and for the sweet notes in the card.

Love,

Penny

P.S. Will get a picture up ASAP. This basket SCREAMS Penny!

OK, I TOLD you I needed to chat this morning!

2010-01-06T04:45:00.005-06:00

Yes, you've seen this picture before.....

I have GREAT NEWS from the import company I design Christmas items for!

If you made it through this post about my association with Midwest of Cannon Falls, then you may have noticed that I had wanted to join with them in donating a portion of the profits earned from the sales of the 2010 Christmas items to the Lymphoma/Leukemia society for research in the field.

They called yesterday and we have come to an agreement to let this happen!

I am SO excited!

They will announce this to their sales team today, at America's Mart in Atlanta, as the gift show before they open the doors to their appointments. (They are also very excited about the fact that they have an increased number of appointments over last year at this time, so maybe things are ready for a real turn around! Let's keep our fingers crossed!)

Later we will work out packaging, info on sales tags, etc., that will let shoppers like you know that if you are purchasing a product designed by me you are helping provide money for research in the field of adult lymphoma/leukemia!

I am proud to be part of this company. They have treated me like family for years.

I hope that everyone will look back at the former post and think JUST HOW STINKIN' CUTE your kitchen will be decked out in gingerbread folks next year!

AND please, haunt your local gift shops and department stores and ask them to order this line for their stores!

Please feel free to forward this blog to ANYONE you know who owns a store, is a buyer, or who might be interested in helping with this cause!

Thank you, so much!

Love,

Penny

Saddened to learn......

2010-01-06T04:37:00.002-06:00

That a brilliant young man, Walter Braswell, had passed away suddenly. I remember when Walter worked for Claude Harris, a former assistant DA while my first husband worked in the DA's office.

Claude was a fine, funny, and wonderful guy. Walter would have had to have been to have worked so closely with Claude.

Walter was 55. I am 56. I've known so many great folks who've gone before they're 60. We all must take better care of ourselves and not ignore things that we think are wrong. I know we can't prevent the inevitable, but I've really learned about "paying attention" to things.

Also, very saddened to learn that the great-grandfather, grandfather, father and father-in-law to my good friends Rick and Liz Pearce, children Davis, Libbo, Maggie, and great grandchildren had passed away on Monday.

Liz had just visited me the Sunday before after checking on her father in law who was having stints put in. Jonathan saw Rick as we were leaving the hospital as Rick was going in to check on his dad. I wonder if Rick learned to dance by watching his Dad dance with his mother? If he did, he had a MIGHTY lucky mother!

My heart and love go out to both of these families who are suffering though such a sad time right now.

Please know I love you, am praying for both families and will try to do what I can while being sort of stuck here at the house.

Love,

Penny

From a post on Four-O-Clocks, to 4:00 a.m. Wednesday to Poppies?????

2010-01-06T03:44:00.011-06:00

Wow. Woke up this morning on the old hospital routine. Brain a' racing, needing some coffee. Needing to talk but Jonathan is still asleep so I'll have to let my fingers do the talking, to play off the old Yellow Pages ad.

Plus, I think the coffee maker just beeped, so if you'll excuse me for just a minute while I grab a cup of java, maybe I can put together some coherent sentences.

Ah, yes....coffee in my red dotted mug AND the surprise of remembering that Sue Blanton Giamo had brought over some Krispy Kreme doughnuts yesterday. You better be prepared. It may be a prednisone, sugar rush, caffeine rich post!

Ok, so I got off on gardening again. I still have big plans and like I said last yesterday, the crazy stuff I did....trying to get out before the Thursday trash trucks picked up the organic gold I could get for free...have begun to pay off.

At the moment I am eyeing a pile of crepe myrtle stems that have been taken off a tree around the corner, because they make great plant stakes. It is too cold at 17 degrees to even think about it right now.....but who knows about later today!

My haybale experiment wasn't the same as the one in the link, because I used mine for making raised beds, in which to contain all the stuff I was collecting, as well as wanting to try the Ruth Stout method.

I had been impressed with lasagna style gardening which actually is a variation of the Ruth Stout method. As I read about Ruth Stout, I realized she had really made gardening EASY. AND she was doing it when she WAS OLD!!!!

Mulch with hay/straw. Keep weeds down. Keep plants moist. They grow. EASY PEASY. And it is!

I also want to point you to a blog by my old friend, William Kruidenier. He is an intensely interesting and fascinating person whom I had the good fortune of meeting nearly 40 years ago.

His interest in organic food growing, vegetarianism, and other political interests that have to do with these issues is deep and powerful. In an older part of his blog, William Kruidenier, he has great pictures of his and or his son's haybale garden, where they got an early start last spring to have some incredibly beautiful vegetables.

William told me that his interest in healthy food grew in part from watching his parents suffer from chronic diseases which may possibly have been prevented by better diets. I have seen this same phenomena with myself, when I was following a GOOD eating plan, as well as watching others around me suffer with stuff could be prevented by just eating better.

OMG. I just realized I was a hypocrite because I admitted to eating a KK doughnut before typing this post.

But, I don't live off of them. Please forgive.

From food to plants again. This time poppy seeds.

Many of my readers may make and enjoy the famous "Poppy Seed Chicken" recipe from our great Winning Season's cookbook. Vegetarians and vegans won't find much in it but it is filled with some DAMN good recipes.

Anywhoo...back to poppy seeds. I also make a pretty good poppy seed pound cake. Actually if it more like one of those Sandra Lee things...not from scratch but Simply Homemade, or whatever the name of her show is. Cakes from scratch have always frustrated me.

But this isn't really about poppy seeds to eat, but delighting in looking at that TEENY TINY seed and realizing the power and might that lays within that tiny black thing.

The color, the magnificent varieties of poppies that spring from a seed so tiny that you just barely have to scratch the dirt in the spring (fall for us), throw the poppy seeds on the ground, lightly press

and keep moist a bit.

In the spring you are rewarded with such beauty that you can't believe it. HUGE flowers, incredible colors. I'm partial to the red/orange ones with black centers, though I love them all.

The petals fall, the seed heads are left. It is tempting to rip them up before they seed heads dry because they aren't that pretty. Better to throw in some zinnia seeds to let them sort of cover up the old poppy seed heads.

But when they are dried, those pods, each of which sprang from ONE TINY SEED are now filled with HUNDREDS or THOUSANDS of seeds, which you just have to shake into a bag and start over again the next year.

You will NOT be sorry.

I will leave you with another Secret Life of Plants video that is very meaningful to me. Please don't think it morbid.

Terrific Tuesday!

2010-01-05T20:47:00.005-06:00

Lasr week, at this time, I thought I'd be in the hospital for two more weeks, if not more.

Toward the end of the week, I thought I might be going home today.

Then, suddenly, I was home, on Saturday!

My, how time as flown!

Getting adjusted back to home life has, as I've already indicated, been wonderful.

The days are passing quickly and I'm trying to do a little more each day.

A load of laundry. Fix a recipe. Enjoy visits from friends old and new.

Chatter on email. Sit and rest when I need to. Enjoy being told to sit and rest.

Try to pick out a new sofa, because I think i've gotten all the use I can out of a 30 year old treasure.

Seeing my family at lunch, when the girls, Jonathan, and Mama are here.

Each day is like a beautiful present to unwrap!

Oh, and the seed catalogs have started to arrive and I'm having tons of fun circling all the things i want to get.

Note: That i WANT to get. Doesn't mean I will, but there are some darn pretty four-o-clocks in a watermelon color
that I've never seen before. I think I WILL get those!

I love old fashioned smell good flowers that bloom late in the afternoon in the summer.

Last year after my big plans of 'the garden of the century" went to hell in a handbag, I did AT LEAST manage to do one thing right.

I would go out in February and get everyone's first grass clippings/last of the leaves that were shredded and bag them up.
My neighbors thought I was nuts. Jonathan thought i was nuts.

I filled haybale lined "raised beds" to the top with over 80 bags of this treasure.

I now have the happiest earthworms EVER and will not have to use a shovel this year.

If I see ANYONE in my neighborhood grabbing this organic gold I will SHOOT you, unless, that is, you want to drop it off at my house.

Then I will kiss you.

Love,
Penny

First day at the new Cancer Treatment Center....

2010-01-04T15:15:00.002-06:00

Wow! WOW! WOW!

A great experience in a beautiful setting. Just a quick visit with Dr. Hinton, a quick chemo shot and then home to some great Chinese food!

jane Smith, librarian par excellence, dropped in with some yummy cream and good book talk.

Now MK and I are slugging around looking at a new catalog I hadn't seen, Grandinroad.

Has a WAY cute hat rack that looks like a giant twig. Might have to add that to the decor as I collect some hats to wear on my newly bald head.

Katie said it was snowing here at 7:30 a.m. I missed it be we keep hearing about snow on the 7th.

IT JUST BETTER NOT INTERFERE WITH TV COVERAGE FROM PASADENA!!!!!!

If y'all haven't gotten the message yet, IT IS GOOD TO BE HOME and feeling as well as I am, considering the circumstances.

Love,
Penny

Satisfaction.....

2010-01-03T19:48:00.002-06:00

To be home, all day long.

To have a husband that plays the perfect, relaxing music for such a day.

To cook a yummy pot roast for some "faux" Italian style beef sandwiches. Send me 5.00 and I'll send you the recipe!

To have my family come see me without having to come to the hospital.

To have Liz and Kathie drop in for a visit....and bring food!

To surprise my mom when I pulled off my "doo rag" and she realized I looked like my dad, when his hair fell out after his chemo.

To have my daughters come and hang out and then work to help me clean up my messy closet. Because i am a mess.
(Actually, I piled up on the bed while they went through stuff and I said "Keep", "No", or "Oooh, what was I thinking?")

To have Katie come across an old Dooney and Burke purse, in which we found some GIANT gold loop earrings that make me look like Yul Brenner in "The King and I". I really don't think I can pull them off. And I think they're circa 1992.

To have Mary-Keeley help organize the the jetsam and flotsam left after getting the closet straightened out.

Oh, and there was an almost full pack of Benson and Hedges Light 100 cigarettes in that purse. 1992 was a stressful year for me. YUCK.

To have the best Santa in the world, my mom, come in with things that came in after Christmas or she had forgotten to bring over on Christmas, so it was like Christmas again! I can't wait to take my new Kindle to the outpatient clinic when I have long days there! Thank you, Mama! Oh, and it has a nice red cover. Because I DO LOVE RED!!!!

To have friends out there like you, who have cared, prayed, read this blog, and I hope will continue to do so.

Love,
Penny

Never underestimate the power of uninterruped sleep.....

2010-01-03T06:04:00.002-06:00

AHHHHHHHHH.......

More AHHHHHHHH......

Coffee in bed, served in my favorite red polka dotted mug by my dear husband...........see one here.

Even MORE AHHHHHH......

No beeps, no tethers to the "Christmas Tree of Life"........

And though I'm wearing some REALLY FUNKY shiny gold FUGGS, I'm still clicking my feet together and saying....

"There's NO PLACE LIKE HOME!"

Today's agenda at home is to be a quiet one...things to put away, doctor's papers to go through, organizing medicines in my el giganto pill dispenser, just generally trying to ease back in. Visits with family.

Emails, FB messages would be most welcome! Phone calls (at the moment, and which I love) are leaving me a little breathless.

Got to build up those little red polka dots of hemoglobin so I can get some more oxygen.

Darn....red dots are EVERYWHERE!!!!!

Love,
Penny

2010-01-02T19:34:00.001-06:00

Hellllllll yes. Home at last!!!! Fresh air!!!!!

Love, Penny

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Sleeping in MY OWN BED tonight!

2010-01-02T19:31:00.002-06:00

Yesterday there was a hint that I might come home today.

Today the nurses came in said "Are you excited about going home today?"

HELLS to the YEAH!!!!

By 10:30 I had blown SPA DCH and sent hugs and kisses down the hall to the nurses. What a great staff!

When the door opened and I felt the fresh air on my face for the first time in 23 days, I almost melted into a puddle of happiness.

Got home, Katie and Mary-Keeley and I sat in the sun and they took the rest of my stringy hair off my head....ahhhhhhhh.

Rested and then we were treated to homemade pizza from Nita and Holden.

My bed is going to feel SO good tonight.

Being next to Jonathan is going to be even better!

Thank you all so very much for caring, praying, gifts, cards and all the other good things I felt while in the hospital.

And don't worry.....the blog will go on. Still have LOTS to say!

Love,
Penny

When I woke up this morning.....

2010-01-02T06:27:00.002-06:00

Yes, all of you were on my mind!
The wonderful visits, gifts, phone calls, emails, texts, prayers.
ALL of it! I'm so VERY, VERY, grateful!

I loved this particular video because it shows what we, errrr, of a certain, errr, age looked like, thought was cool, etc.
Did you catch those white "go go" boots?

I'm actually intrigued with finding a wig that resembles the
female singer's look

Had a nice quiet morning and early afternoon. People were
resting at home, I was quietly finishing My Life in France,
which deserves a second read, IMHO.

Old friends dropped in. Thanks Harry and Jenny...always SO fun to see you both. So glad
y'all and Jean and Sandy had such a fun NYE!

Night ended with one my best visits EVER, because Pam and Anna Gordon walked in the door. Anna Gordon, Summa CumLaude student at U of A, grad student at Georgia,
discovered she had Leukemia within the past year. BUT YOU WOULD NEVER KNOW IT.

Anna has a true "kick ass" attitude about this whole thing. Thewisdom this old lady learned from a 23 year old was AMAZING. What Pam had to share was AMAZING and VERY helpful.

We have promised each other that we WILL be sitting side by side on Oprah's yellow couch one of these days and that Oprah will be trying to butt in to remind us that it is HER show.

But it won't be. We won't give her time to talk!

Before I forget, I should mention that Anna (and her sister Torrey) were former students from back in my library days,
when I had the INCREDIBLE fortune to teach at Tuscaloosa's first magnet school, at Central Elementary School.

Program UP: Unfolding Potential.

We were different, we were strange (to some who couldn't really break out of the traditional
"school" mode--like worrying if their kids would still be invited to the "nice birthday parties")

AND we were an OASIS, a HEAVEN, a GODSEND to those families knew their children marched to the beat of a "different drummer." It is just too damn bad that we didn't have charter schools at the time.

There's a book in that story, too, to be told by the many who went through it. And if I have anything to do with it, there will bea bunch of us sitting on Oprah's couch again!

And as a P.S. to my Central story....when "Room Service" door knocked yesterday for lunch, in walked a tall thin boy whoseface was very familiar. I stopped him, turned him around so I could see his name tag. Cardae Thomas, one of the sweetestkids that went through Central Elementary while I was there. I jumped up and hugged him and held onto him for dear life.

He had recognized my last name on the order form, seen ME through my lack of hair, and quietly whispered, "I wondered if you would remember me, Ms. Mc".

Oh yes, Cardae...I remembered and will NEVER forget you!

Love,
Penny

Survivor....not the TV schlock kind.....

2010-01-01T06:46:00.000-06:00

I was going through my inbox and came across an email from Walter Grant, a local guy. His family, sadly, has suffered the tragedy of losing a child before they should have.

I have many friends to whom this has happened. I cannot even begin to fathom the depth of grief they still must bear every day. To all my friends who have had to go through this, I am deeply, deeply sorry.

But this isn't about that. It is about Walter's opening sentence to me in that email.

"My name is Walter Grant and I am a Leukemia survivor."

It was sort of late last night, since I'd had that nice Phenergan nap, and I was still a little groggy.

I didn't "get" that sentence at first. I sent a quick reply to let him know how much I appreciated the letter, talked about meeting Beth, his wife at the Church Bazaar. (Are you noticing how much is happening around this Church Bazaar thing????)

I told him I remembered Adam, as he was in Katie's class and was the boyfriend of one of Mary-Keeley's best friends when he died.

We exchanged a couple of other quick emails re: dealing with Leukemia, things we could do to help around here, etc, then it was time for shut eye.

I woke up this morning and was re-reading the email and this time his opening sentence took on a new meaning.

It is my PLAN (not a dream) to be able to share those same words with anyone who is willing to read or listen to them:

"My name is Penny McAllister and I am a Leukemia survivor."

Don't groan....you knew this one was coming....

"We pause this programming for a commercial break....LONG commercial break"

2010-01-01T05:41:00.000-06:00

OK, don't hit me but this is a preview of Christmas 2010, yes Christmas 2010 which will be available at America's Mart in Atlanta, January 6-13th, as well as all the other regional markets that are held around the country during January. Since the catalog has been mailed, I decided to post the styled shot for the catalog....there are MORE cute pieces in this collection.

Yes, I am engaging in a bit of shameless self promotion. Skip this post if you skip commercials on TIVO. Won't bother me ONE BIT. NOT ONE BIT. And this is a LONG post.

I have another story to tell. One of the most interesting, adventurous, eye opening stories of my life. A story of courage. A story of taking a chance. Enough of that.....but in the spirit of another great story, I'll entitle mine......

MIDWEST and ME

Many of you know that I am a licensed designer with a company called Midwest of Cannon Falls, recently merged with another company CBK, henceforth known as MWCBK. This is a company that makes things overseas and then imports for sales in stores like Dillards, Anna Kate and Co., Bow Regards. I make the original prototype, it is sent overseas for reproduction, and end up in stores like the above.

Some of might not have known that, but now you do. For those of you that may have been wondering how I make all those things in the stores, there ya go. I know some think I'm making all of those at my house. Jonathan surely does, because our house is more studio/storage/etc. than a house sometimes. But, I digress.

As an only child, I spent lots of time imagining things, making things, learning to sew very simple doll clothes with my grandmothers, that sort of thing. My mother and father provided me the things I needed with which to occupy myself.

I am also sort of obsessive-compulsive and have always said "Hmmmmm, I can make that myself". Not all have been successful, but what the hey....it was fun. And, most often, I was teaching myself how to do it, either by just "studying" on it or reading directions from a book.

One of the first stages was the huge crepe paper flower stage. All over my room.

Next, the wooden bead necklace phase, where my mom just shook her head at how much acrylic paint cost in 1960 something. But still, we headed to this store and that to find the "perfect" string or the "perfect" paint color.

Lest we forget, the painted lunchbox purse phase, where I perfected the art of swirly monograms on the side. A neighborhood idol, the late Carolyn Flanagan Whitfield, beauty and style queen at Tuscaloosa High school bought one from me. WHAT AN AFFIRMATION!!!

There are more...needlepoint phase, (learned how to do it while sitting under one of those sunbeam hairdryers so I could pass the time quickly) later, the cross stitch phase, where I still marvel at the fact I could make a tiny stitch like that. Oh wait, I had 20 year old eyeballs then. More phases, too numerous to mention.

I continued to play with this creative gift while doing things like creating very simple backdrops for events. One year it was a "Peter Max" styled backdrop for one of our THS proms. It was not so great but I was proud. One day Jonathan and I were looking at old prom pictures, each with other dates. He said, "I hated that background." I said, "I painted that background." He said, "I still hated that background." We laughed and moved on.

Later years, there were more backdrops, table decorations, thinking of impossible things to do in a short amount of time. (Hmmm, making paper mache life rafts about three days before a themed party? Jean Gordon and I were frantically trying to dry them in her oven and not let them burn up)

Oh, there are so many, many more. If you want to hear about them, you'll just have to buy my Oprah's Book Club selection book when it comes out!

SO, big jump forward. (I have a good Okra Santa story to tell, but again, you'll just have to buy the book.)

After 25 years employeed in one school system, I change to another one. Whole different atmosphere. My creative brain, which had not been totally dormant, especially the prior six years to "the jump" began to flourish.

NOTE: At this point, I'm sure Jonathan is channelling his music mantra..."Don't bore us, get to the chorus." J, my love, that's for you to do with the songs in your heart. I have to be what I am.

My friend, Beth Roberts, who has always gotten my quirky sense of humor and art (along with many other folks) had shown me a copy of a 1999 Halloween issue of Mary Englebreit's Home Companion. (May it rest in piece....greatest mag out there, IMHO).

I had seen the issue but had been more focused on the fact they had featured a home full of southern folk art, as well as the private backyard retreat of another southern woman whom I had known back from an earlier first marriage life. I had NOT noticed what Beth was showing that day......

There were these adorable figures. Quaint, quirky, vintage, cute, huggable.

She said, "I bet you could make these."

"I can't do anything like that! I've never sculpted a thing in my life! Besides, I don't want to make them, I JUST WANT THEM!"

Off to the internet to search the artist out. Debbee Thibault.

Off to the phone to call local stores. They never heard of her.

Off to the internet again, to find who sold them. Then found out I couldn't afford them. Sigh.

But I would drool on my keyboard over them. DROOL, people, DROOL.

Fast forward again. Christmas comes. We are ready to put up the old lights that have burned on my tree for nearly 80 years. *Note: they burn for 15 seconds, but we count it anyway. The cord has broken. I am sick.

Again, off to the internet, where I locate a guy who collects this stuff. I explain my dilemma and the nice man sends me TWO new "old cords". Christmas can continue.

How to thank this man? Aha! I'll make a papier mache Santy Claus, holding a string of lights! I do, send it off, and he is thrilled.

Next, I want to do something for my aide at school. She loves snowmen. Ta Dah! A snowman.

Then, two more Santas, one for my mom, one for Jean Gordon, my best friend who has accepted and loved everything I've ever made for her. (Of course, so has my mom!)

I find myself overwhelmed with ideas, so much so that I am popping out of bed at 3:30 a.m., working until 6:00 a.m. and then getting ready for school. Crashing on the couch at 7:00. Wasn't I a fun wife???

I reach a stage where I have so many things I've made, I can't do anything with them, so I try selling them on eBay. Slowly I build a following, enjoy some success, make a little money because what I really want to do is buy a Debbee Thibault piece.

Another flash forward...I'm sitting in my PJs (spent one whole spring break never moving from the work table) and have one of my "flashes". "Hmmmm," I'm thinking to myself..."wonder how much it costs to get one of those little "Editor's Picks" pictures often found in the front of magazines? "Hmmmmm"

Thinking it cost 10K or something, I decide to forge ahead and call the first number I find in the front of Country Living. No pain, no gain. Find out it IS actually editor's pick. No cost. My head is reeling.

"Why do you ask?" responds Matt Holm, associate art director or assistant or something.

"Well, I make these little things and thought you might be interested in seeing them, ummm, ya know?"

"What kind of things?"

"Well".....and I am still trying to struggle to describe them when I realized I had a new digital camera and had taken pictures of some sold things.

"What issue are you working on now?" some voice whispers in my ear to say to him. I realize I can send him Halloween pieces.

So off go the pictures. Forty five minutes later, I get a response. They like them, and want them up there. OMG. These were sold pieces! I had to get busy to make more! It felt like the scene in Julie/Julia when Julia Child is on the porch and opens her advance check. Jonathan and I were jumping up and down in the ironing/computer/art room!

August 30, 2001. The magazine comes out. There are the figures. It is real.

Are you tapping your feet, or fingers wondering about when in the hell I'm going to get to MIDWEST and ME?

Ok, here ya go....

Spring break, 2002. Complete repeat of the above. Pajamas all day, working on things. Another "flash". "Hmmmmmmm, wonder what it would be like to have these reproduced more easily? Wonder if one of these import companies would be interested? But how would they find me?

Yes, the "internets", folks.

I pick two companies, only because I liked their products. Dept. 56 and Midwest of Cannon Falls. They have contact info for folks like me who might bring new, fresh products to their line.

Dept. 56 responded right away...."Interested, but give us a week to really look at them."

Nudged them with a couple of other emails and then said..."Oh well, at least I tried."

A couple of weeks go by and I've almost forgotten about the Midwest email when I receive an email from someone named Cassandra Hatten, MW licensing co-ordinator. They liked what they saw and wanted to see more. More pictures are exchanged. Ideas start to flow.

An agreement is reached. AGAIN, Jonathan get to do the Paul and Julia child jumping up and down scene. It is surreal.

That was in 2002, and since that time I have designed things for Midwest, now MWCBK. They have been, and continue to be, some of the most kind, wonderful, enthusiastic, supportive people I've ever met. They "got" me. They "got" my art. They stretched my abilities to do things I didn't think I could do, like sculpting small things. They have been as important to my life as my family and the blood that flows through my body. I am better, because of them. Many of my "first contacts" are now gone from MW...Cassi, Shantelle, Margo, Angela, Ingrid. I miss them a lot, because they were good to me. Very, very good.

Susan, the designer I work with, is still there. Kari, my new contact with the company is there...and probably wondering "Who IS the crazy woman that doesn't recognize pale colors?"

But I have one more dream.....and am stating it publicly. My dream is that somehow the "powers that be" at MWCBK and I can work out a deal where, together, we share in making a donation to the Lymphoma/Leukemia Society of America, from the sales made at the markets that are coming up. So that people who buy my products in their local gift shops know that they are not just buying a gift for someone, a happy for themselves, or something to decorate their homes for the holidays.

I want them to know they are helping fight a disease that knocked me off my feet, literally, on December 10, 2009.

Love,

Penny

P.S. I am having SERIOUS stove envy in the picture at the top. SERIOUS.

"Ought Ten?" What will we call this year? BETTER, that's for DAMN SURE!

2010-01-01T03:31:00.001-06:00

Happy New Year!!!!

Hope everyone had a safe, sound, happy celebration last night!

OUT with the OLD! IN with the NEW!

Get a new broom, get a new mop. Don't sweep or swish all the old dirty gray water around on your floor or in your mind! Fill an imaginary helium balloon with all the crap that is inside of you and LET IT GO!

Want to do something new? Don't say, "Welllllllllllll, I just don't have time." We all MAKE time for the things we want to do, whether it s something fun OR engaging in activities to that make us very UNproductive.

And hey, you better know that I'm the queen of the last one!

I picked the picture above because I've always loved the art of Jessie Wilcox Smith. Her story is wonderful and I hope all my teacher and "bookie" fans will take a minute to visit the link. You will be amazed. Of course, readers who are just following along might be interested, too, but you book people will LOVE her story! Oh, and guys who are reading...her illustrating improved after studying with Howard Pyle. Need I say more?

When I was growing up my dad's mom lived on 15th Avenue here in town. She had a Jessie Wilcox Smith reproduction of a small child with red curly hair, dressed in footed pajama, looking like she was coming down the steps backwards.

That was the way I had to come down the steps at that house, as there was no carpet on the stairs. Just slick wood. Of course, the most fun way to come down those stairs was to sit at the top and propel yourself, bottom down, until you reached the landing. Bumpity, bumpity bump! She let me do it because it kept me out of her hair so she could get back to sewing new dresses for me!

Ok, sorry that was such a long story. But the picture reminded me of it so much, I had to tell it.

So here's a New Year's suggestion for you that doesn't involve any money, exertion of your physical body or giving up chocolate cake. You just a little notebook and pencil or pen.

Start writing your stories. Start writing your thoughts. Start a journal.

Even if you only DATE the page with today's date and say, "Hello, 2010! What are we going to do this year?" It is a start.

Oh, and don't start whining, "There's no store open for me to get some nice journal", or "But I can't write" (DUHHHHH, if you're reading this you can write!) Nobody's saying, "Be Hemingway".

Grab a piece of paper, date it, write a little something and then save it in your fancy new journal if you want to get one.

As I've lain in this bed looking back over the past six weeks or so, I've wished SO badly that I had been a journal keeper. A journal of what went on that day, with family, friends, thoughts. I probably would have even noted that I felt a little breathless, had a weird cough, wondered why I was so tired and uninterested in things I normally love to do, might have made a little note of it.

Not that pinpointing a specific date, earlier than December 10th would have made any difference.

Oh, WAIT! Yes it would have! I would have been home, struggling to deal with the Christmas hoopla instead of SPA DCH!

Ok, as you can tell I'm feeling pretty good into the first three hours of 2010. We can chalk that up to a couple of shots for nausea, one of which put me out for five hours yesterday after having some delicious quiet time with Katie and Mary-Keeley. MK sat in the chair and did some crochet. Katie stretched out on the bed with her head at my feet and we just talked some more words from a Mother's heart.

My mom visited, as did Dana Taylor, toting pictures of a beautiful white Christmas in Virginia, where she had been visiting her daughter, Margaret.

Then, Jonathan popped in for a quick NYE celebration bringing a bottle of wine called "Irony". It was just about that time I realized I needed some Zofran, which didn't work. The phenergan did.

He left, quiet as mouse, so we didn't get to share a little NYE toast to better things for this year.

HOWEVER, there might be a little mimosa on the menu this morning, courtesy of some friends.

Because alcohol IS sterile, you know!

Oh, and before I forget, the first person I saw in 2010 was my PCA, Debbie, a HUGE sweetheart that is so kind, talks so sweetly to us. It was very nice!

Wow....from Jessie Wilcox Smith to this.....

2010, BABY!

2009-12-31T19:43:00.003-06:00

HAPPY NEW YEAR, MAMA!

Here's to new beginnings, new normals and of course, new furniture!! Suck it 2009, we're outta here!!

love,

MK

oh and, here's to the best New Year's Eve scene from a movie I've ever seen.

Nice day, already!

2009-12-31T07:46:00.000-06:00

Dr. Hinton just stopped by for his daily rounds.

I knew he was coming so I quickly put in my funky tomato earrings, since I hadn't gotten dressed yet.

"You don't look like a leukemia patient!".

What more can you say?

Depending on how I react to them reducing antibiotics (to see whether I can keep a temperature/fever at bay) he said I might being able to come home as early as the latter part of the weekend! AMERICA! This weekend!

Got to call Haverty's to see if they can rush that new couch to the house!

Can't wait to drink coffee out of my favorite red and white polka dotted coffee cup!

Can't wait to sleep in my own bed, with my man!

Can't wait to pet my dogs!

CAN'T WAIT.

So, keep your prayers, chants, claps for Tinkerbell going!

Oh, and CAN'T WAIT to watch the game on the 7th, AT HOME!

ROLL, TIDE, ROLL

I'll end this post with one of the most WONDERFUL musical experiences Jonathan and I have ever had.

Michael Buble, in Birmingham, last October.

Third row, almost center, floor seats. Our anniversay gift to one another, even though our anniversary is in November.

We found out he was coming back to Atlanta in March, 2010, and wanted to take the girls to see him. He is not only an INCREDIBLE singer, but a performer/entertainer that will knock your socks OFF.

I wanted it to be my musical family Christmas surprise like the year we went to see Stevie Wonder in Nashville.

Found tickets, had the money to pay for them, floor seats, 4th or 5th row. Bad thing was it seemed a little sketchy--seller would meet you at the venue and lead you to your seats. Weird. Afraid it would be massive screw-up, so backed off.

That was on Friday, December 4. On Thursday, December 10 I found I had joined the "C" club. Was this some sort of "sign" that I didn't need to commit that money to something like this?

Was this a "God Thing"?

I don't know, but whether I'm here or there I'll be wearing this great T-Shirt Becky Hulsey Satterfield sent me yesterday which has a picture of our great state of Alabama on it that says:

I WILL MESS WITH TEXAS!

Sorry, Texas cousins.....

And now, for yet another musical video treat....words not always appropriate to the situation, but theme is.

Enjoy!

Mac attack of a different kind.....

2009-12-31T06:53:00.000-06:00

O.M.G. I loved me some Bernie Mac. I never knew much about him until his TV show, and when we would watch it we would howl. So, so, funny!

My favorite part would be when he would face the camera and say stuff like "Listen up, America" or just "America" and proceed to say what he needed to say, usually about the scene that had taken place or was about to.

Sometimes he made other points, and made them very well.

I was so saddened to learn about the day he died. A great talent.

Miss you, Bernie!

Hare today, gone tomorrow......

2009-12-31T06:40:00.001-06:00

THIS was the post I had intended to begin with yesterday, until the DCH network went on the putz.

In my aged brain, I seem to remember Bullwinkle trying to do one of his stupid hat tricks, with Rocky delivering the punchline, "Hare today, gone tomorrow!"

I thought it was appropriate, considering I was needing to get in contact with Dolly's wigmaker.

All I can say is I'm sure thankful my special Johnny Beck took care of me with at least a shortening of the hair.

It might be time for the Demi Moore scene. At least she was doing it for a powerful woman movie.

NOT like Britney Spears!

I've always admired women who had the courage to keep their hair really, really short.

Sharon Pilsch comes to mind immediately. Strong woman, no time to fool with hair (meant with love, Sharon! You KNOW how much I love you!) Only child, friend of the Lane Jackson, big sister to one of my best growing up friends, Pat Jackson Bowman. Cute, perky, happy, bubbly. ALL. THE. TIME.

Sharon, and her sister-in-law, Amelia Pilsch, are no strangers to hospitals, sad to say. But, before Christmas, while trying to juggle finishing up work at Verner (where she is the EVERYTHING to every person in that building), AND traveling back and forth to Birmingham where her husband is awaiting a kidney transplant, she shows up at my door!

I hear Jonathan talking to her out in the hall. Hear a rustle of something. In she comes, dressed to the "nines" to keep the germs away, since that has she has to dress to go visit Frank on the transplant unit at UAB.

It looked like a yellow hazmat dress, outfit completed with a blue mask through which she talked. I finally told her to lift her mask so I could see her mouth move for a minute. She did, but pulled it right back down. We shared funny stories. It was a great visit!!

I love you, Sharon Pilsch!

Love,
Penny

FREAK out!........

2009-12-31T06:12:00.000-06:00

So, I freaked some folks out yesterday, it seems. WHAT? No post? Help!

Or, Katie may have freaked some folks out yesterday with very honest feelings. Yea, Katie!
(I had warned about this in one of my first posts but maybe you didn't see it. No offense meant.)

And, I've GOT to get a wig catalog or borrow some old ones (thank you Andrea and Kathie) in case
there are any extra hanging out in someone's closet. They just need to be de-germed.

I hear they've got cute ones at the Cancer Treatment Center but I can't get out in the general public right now.

My favorite wig story I've heard so far is that my water aerobics teacher had two wigs. A "Mexican" one and a regular one. I'm picturing that she is pretending to be Penelope Cruz on some days, Becky on
others. Turns out not to be that at all. One wig is for WEARING to Mexican restaurants (because we
KNOW what our clothes smell like when we leave those places. (Or, even a Japanese steak house!)

Her other wig is for the regular days!

Smart thinking, Becky!

Technical difficulties.....

2009-12-30T21:43:00.000-06:00

DCH network running spotty today. Tried an early morning post and had to give up.

Lots of wonderful company, which kept me blissfully busy. Tried to post again during a break, and spotty network again.

Night meds have been taken. Feeling MUCH better today. No chemo fatigue! YAY!

Good night, sleep tight.....don't let the bed bugs bite!

Viewer Discretion Advised...

2009-12-29T22:10:00.001-06:00

Mom started loosing her hair today. It was weird. I knew she had cancer but up until now she looked fine. By fine I mean “not sick”. I am so used to seeing the cancer patient on tv with no hair, the woman with the turban on her head or the baseball cap/dew rag combo out in public that meant “Yes I am a cancer patient”. It is a strange thing to hear-“Mom started losing her hair today-she said it came out in clumps in the shower”. But to actually see her with the stray blonde hairs covering her shoulders-ones she didn’t even know she had lost yet-is completely different. She was up eating and talking-had even gotten out of bed to eat the delicious meatloaf she had ordered from “Room Service”. I kept trying to look in her eyes, her face, while she talked but I couldn’t stop staring at her hair. It didn’t look patchy like one would imagine. It was still mostly there-like she hadn’t lost any at all. A little thin, but normal to me. Then I saw her back and shoulders and the light was hitting them just right to show the slight yellow gold tint of stray hairs. Like ones you would pick off your sisters jacket in line at Target. I think now I have finally accepted the fact that my mother is sick.

Fuck you cancer. I hate you.

Love from a Mother's Heart.....

2009-12-29T19:54:00.000-06:00

I know it isn't close to Valentine's Day, but I'm betting the stores have already switched over their displays. I thought I join the

fun!

I had a wonderful day today, visits from Amelia Pilsch, Bea Powell, who graciously stopped by to adjust my glasses, something I had planned to do, well, before you know what. Jean Gordon, my mom, Katie, MK, and of course,JonathanIf I left someone out, I'm so sorry.

I found out that I'm beginning to go into what they call the "nadir" stage...the lowest of the low, which begins to

happena between the 7th and 14th days after you begin chemotherapy. I'm on day 13. It is a good thing I like the number 13!

Drained of energy, though blood count may be ok. It is part of the effects of the chemo.

Back to the heart above. It was a good day for a Mama to speak words of the heart to her daughters.

It was a good day to feel and send words of the heart to my Mother, though we didn't have to say a thing.

I am very content.

If you have words of the heart you need to say to someone: husband, wife mother, father, sister, brother, aunt, uncle, child, it matters not. Just say them.

Let your heart free.

You will feel so much better, even thought it might hurt for a minute or might be hard to do.

Just do it.

Love,

Penny

P. S. I've screwed up the formatting and will try to fix it tomorrow.

Dear Dolly Parton, I need your wigmaker's name....

2009-12-29T11:51:00.000-06:00

Yeah, it has started to happen. Time for me to think about different styles....

Cute, perky Doris Day?

Kate Gosselin?

Sinead O'Connor?

LaWanna, FANTASTIC NURSE, just told me that this (hair) and some fatigue not caused by low blood (like the other day) is the evidence that the chemo is taking hold and doing its thing.

I'm wondering if I can grow in some funky, cool, different colored hair when all this is done!

And how can I leave this post with out this.....

Feelin' Groovy.....

2009-12-29T05:14:00.001-06:00

I don't even need to write anything else on this post.
A night of GOOD sleep and two units of blood has left me.....

Hope you have a GROOVY day!

Love,
Penny

Lazy Day....

2009-12-28T17:49:00.001-06:00

OMG....isn't this fun? This is just how we played and heard this song, "back in the day."

Scratches, pops, and all!

It has been a lazy day for me. Nice visit from my cousins on my Mama's side, Glenda Goldfinger and Anita Hoskins.

Glenda brought the cutest figurine she made of me, holding my hands in the air to "Good Morning, Starshine"! It even has an open back gown, complete with butt cheek hanging out, and my FUGGS on my feet. Priceless!

Anita, another OUTLANDER fan, brought me the latest part of the series, Echo in the Bone, along with a parrot head wine stopper (which I can use HERE), and a pair of cool socks! Thanks so much!

A day in the bed, due to the "low blood" (aka, low hemoglobin, which is just part of this deal), and have had two units of blood.

Tomorrow should be a perkier day!

Speaking of blood. Mama told me that people had asked her about donating blood for me, which is SO thoughtful.
I asked the nurses about this but since there is a shelf life on the blood (you can't believe what all I've learned
about this stuff, just by chatting away with the FABULOUS nurses here) and that the best thing would be to just
donate blood to the blood bank. That way, if somebody needs blood before I do, it will be there for them....and
then when I need blood, there will be some for me.

But here's the twist....I'm O negative and can only receive O negative blood. So, if you've got it, come donate it!!
I found this simple explanation, in case you're wondering why only O negative is what I can get.

But the coolest thing is watching it flow in.

RED.. POWER. LIFE.

And, it reminds me of a CRIMSON TIDE, too!

Seepyhead Jones...

2009-12-28T07:53:00.001-06:00

Well, folks, might just have found the right combo for sleep last night!

Usually when the 4:00 a.m. activity starts, I'm wide eyed and busy tailed.

Not this morning...I fell asleep AGAIN and woke up 7:00.

Then the nurse told me my blood counts were down so it would be tranfusion time again.
Eat your heart out, Edward Cullen.....I get blood easier than you do!

Also some more platelets.

I think I may have talked all my wonderful visitor's ears off yesterday...

Alan and Mary Beth Dennis, Liz Pearce, Liz and Tom Belk, Scott and Beth, Catherine Collier and Beth Roberts...thanks for stopping by! Tonic for the soul!

Jonathan was here for a bit and then he went home to chillax. Mama rolled in, like Santa, all over again, with needed things, especially an electric razor. No more blades for me!

MK brought me DELICIOUS flautas from Iguana Grill.

Katie showed up and then her friend Julie Harvey, who presented me with the most wonderful gifts...a Morgan Country Junior League cookbook and the incredible POWER. LIFE. RED. blanket! OMG, Julie and Skippy! What a special present! It felt great on the bed last night!

Then, the girls went shopping and found more cute tops at Old Navy, as well as more ways to contain the all the needed stuff around the room. I guess you you could say they had fun outfitting my new "dorm room"

The day ended with Beth Roberts and me, talking through our hearts.

Only mine was filtered through a big dose of benedryl, given IV right before a platelet transfusion.

Poor Beth....she knows me now at the molecular level. She got the full effects of a very loose tongue. Even still, we were able to talk about "God's Plan" and what her mother's experience was like as she went through cancer. It was very heartwarming, and wonderful, and a conversation I hope to continue.

It will be amore relaxed day for me today. Needing blood means I need to slow down a bit.

Emails welcome. I'm going to be kind of lazy today. Breakfast has just been served!

Love,
Penny

2009-12-27T19:21:00.001-06:00

Just incase you wondered....yes....this is usually the look I get from the family as I pester away at everyone in the room. Isn't being the youngest so fun?? What? I'm just trying to lighten the mood...... :)

Peace. MK.

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

iPhone practice

2009-12-27T19:04:00.002-06:00

Ok, I have just downloaded the blogger App so this means we will hopefully be able to share much more pics and maybe even video!! Hooray!! Here's a belated Christmas card.

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

Sunday Funday!!

2009-12-27T18:46:00.002-06:00

Today, Katie and I went out with a long list of necessities for Queen Penny. Mom's dorm room is really coming along, complete with plastic drawer sets, magazine & DVD organizers, clutter catching baskets and of course, a closet full of rainbow-inspired cotton wonders from our favorite store, Cold Gravy.

Shopping is fun, especially for people who will wear anything and everything BRIGHT!! She'll never wear neutrals again, watch out!! Oh and, who knew Cancer looked so good?? Isn't she Lovely?? Isn't she Wooonnnnderfffull?

2009-12-27T18:35:00.002-06:00

Mom's new blanket from Julie Trammel, Katie's Pi Phi pledge sister. What a thoughtful gift from such a wonderful friend!!

IMPORTANT NOTICE!!!!

2009-12-27T08:59:00.000-06:00

I was fiddling around with stuff this morning, changing colors, changed the title of the blog.

When you click on www.pennymcallisterupdate.blogspot.com, you should see:

Love, Penny

Fortunately, I love the color change.

Unfortunately, I lost all my followers.

I hope you will reset whatever you need to to get to the Love, Penny site (same content/comments there) and re-add yourself as a follower.

Also, feel free to spread the love!

This is IT!

2009-12-27T05:36:00.001-06:00

While not the 1979 version of one of my ALL TIME FAVORITE songs, it is still quite delicious to listen to as well as view the incredible Michael McDonald and Kenny Loggins perform live.

When the song came out, the lyrics had a personal meaning to me that were QUITE different than what Kenny Loggins had written them for

His father was ill, about to give up. He wrote this to help his father.

I was trying to tell Jonathan I was his miracle.

You probably heard this song and interpreted in your own personal way.

At any rate, ENJOY.

And if you have to, STAND UP AND FIGHT!